Whether you are under pressure to wake up and show up like everyone is doing around you, or you are asking “God when” because of all the pajamas pictures all over social media or you are feeling left out in the Detty December gigs and paparazzi all over the place, be assured that you might not be alone in this.
Maybe you experienced a bad breakup or divorce in the year or you are growing old now and missing all the old memories that come with Christmas or you lost someone special during the year or you are just being affected by the latest “we are Igbos mantra” on “X” where everyone is displaying their big mansions and big cars in the village and you’re wondering why things are not working for you. You might be going through Christmas depression and this is not an uncommon form of depression for a lot of people.
Christmas blues, holiday blues, holiday anxiety, or winter blues can be described as a form of seasonal affective disorder that is currently categorized as a specifier for other mood and depressive disorders in the DSM-5. According to studies, approximately 40% of adults are riddled with social anxiety around the holidays and many turn to food and alcohol as coping mechanisms, which can result in a downward spiral. A survey by the American Psychological Association found that 38% of people felt their stress levels increased during the holiday season. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) found that 64% of people living with a mental illness reported that their conditions worsened around the holidays.
Even though access to statistics on this might be uncommon in Africa, our cultural conditioning and behavioral patterns indicate that Africans might suffer more from Christmas depression considering our loud and bubbly lifestyles, the tendency to seek acceptance and validation, the outrageous emphasis on the need to be rich and the implication of childhood trauma on our view of money and wealth.
How do you know you might be experiencing Christmas depression:
- A feeling of overwhelming sadness, crankiness, or hopelessness
- Less energy and a tendency to stay in bed to either oversleep or struggle to sleep
- Negative thinking, including extreme doom and gloom thoughts
- Trouble concentrating
- Addictive behaviors like drinking more, sex binges, taking drugs thoughts about hurting yourself or ending it all.
- Unexpected Fatigue and complete loss of interest in activities
- Constant mood swings and picking fights with those you love
- Greater appetite and tendency to get lost in food or loss of appetite
- More desire to be alone
- Thoughts of suicide
- An increase in guilt and self-blame
- A change in social behavior – not wanting to talk to friends or overtly
- Tendency to make efforts to overly force non-existent relationships or friendship
- Feeling pressured and left behind like nothing is good about your life.
If you can resonate with any of the symptoms listed above, here are the few self-therapy you can give to yourself to help you cope and feel better.
- Make a gratitude journal, list out two to five things you are grateful for about your life daily.
- Get lost in self-love, go on a spa date(you can do this at home and make use of what you have) Treat yourself like a queen/king while ravishing every moment of loving yourself. Go for a walk, hug yourself, hit the gym, and dance like no one is watching.
- Stop comparing yourself with anyone. Comparison leads to low self-esteem which is one of the major leading factors to depression. Understand that Your journey is different and in a lot of cases everyone is fighting their secret battles.
- Avoid social media as much as possible, you can watch a Netflix series if possible, but stop watching other people’s lives that seem to make your own beautiful lifeless attractive
- Use a mirror exercise. Stand in front of your mirror and say positive things about yourself and your life, there are a lot of things that are beautiful about your life but you are the only one that is not seeing.
- Remember the best revenge for a heartbreak is success. If someone who breaks your heart looks back and sees how dark and unprogressive your life has become just because you couldn’t move on, they will only be grateful they left you, you should rather give them a show by putting your life together, let them sees you and feel they missed a gem. Do it not necessarily for them, but for you.
- Push yourself to go out, even if it is for a walk, just go get some sunlight to improve your serotonin. You can go on a solo movie date or take yourself out for lunch or dinner date. Learn to enjoy your own company.
- Make phone calls, reach out to those who deserve your love, and engage in conversation that makes you laugh and brings beautiful memories.
- Talk to a Counselor or therapist. If you feel you can’t handle the feelings anymore. Your Therapist will help you process your emotions and guide you to living a happy and fulfilling life.
In conclusion, Christmas blues might go on its own as soon as the holiday is over, but if you don’t feel suicidal, please reach out to the suicide help in your country immediately. For those not feeling the Christmas blues now, here are a few points that can guide you to prepare yourself against this in the future:
- Make adequate plans for the holiday period
- Travel if you can
- Grieve when you have to
- Focus on what is good and important
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